“Have patience. All things are difficult before they become easy.” – Saadi

Do you ever have those days, or weeks, or months when you don’t know what to do, or where to go or how to change?  Do you feel like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day, like your life is on repeat no matter how hard you try or what you try to change?

The internet abounds with all sorts of messages about positivity.  Think Zen.  Be positive. Super Soul Sunday.  How to Quit Your Job, Move to Some Exotic Island and Become a Millionaire without doing ANYTHING!

Being positive is great.  Being Zen is great.  Being a millionaire, I’m sure, is great.  But, let’s all be realistic for a minute.  What if you want to be these things but every time you try you go nowhere and you don’t know why?  What do you do?

1. Focus on the little things.

Do you have a garden or a patio? Sit outside and listen to the birds sing.  Go for a walk and notice the trees and the grass and the flowers.  Take a drive down to the beach and listen to the waves crashing.

Buy a little water fountain thingy and listen to the water rippling down the stones.  Get on your bike and go for a ride.  Pack a picnic and take it to a park with a book and sit under a tree. Hear the wind rippling through the leaves.

Focus on the little things around you and the space they inhabit.  Doing this takes the focus off yourself and your worries.

2. Keep Trying

Gosh this is a hard one.  Many times we want to give up. Stop trying. Stop investing.  Stop caring and stop loving.  There are many times I wanted to give up, but I kept on going.

As the saying goes, “Fall down seven times, get up eight”.  Don’t you hate falling down?  We all hate failing.  We all hate feeling like we aren’t accomplishing anything.  We all hate feeling less than or unloved or unwanted or unsure.  Life isn’t always fair and it won’t always give you what you want when you want it.

The only way to get what you need and not necessarily what you want is to keep trying. Put yourself out there in life and love.

3.  Give to others

Volunteer or find a way to give of yourself. We are all connected and if you can’t help yourself maybe you can help someone else.  Maybe you have an elderly neighbor that needs assistance shopping or someone who needs their dog walked.

I admit I’m not a good volunteer.  I tried volunteering at the animal shelter, but I didn’t get any satisfaction out of it.  Call me mean (not that I don’t love animals), but I didn’t feel like anyone cared whether I was there or not.

So, instead I decided to adopt a troop through www.SoldiersAngels.com.  That way I was sure what I was doing was helping someone in particular.  I knew that I was giving a bunch of soldiers a sense of home, even if only for a few minutes, or an hour or a day.  Bake cookies or send a care package.

Giving, even if it’s only your time or energy can make a difference in someone’s life and will make you feel better about yourself. Even if this is a selfish motivation, who cares, you’re still helping.

4. Try something. Anything.

If you hate your job but don’t know what else to do then think about what you would do if you were rich and didn’t have to work.  This does not include sitting around watching television.   The less you watch television the more you realize how much time you have and how free you become to do other things.

Do you love baking?  Start baking on the side and see if you can turn it into a business.  Maybe you love to write.  Start a blog.  Maybe you want to become a teacher or a lawyer or a cop.  Do something. Do anything that will help you take one step towards that goal.

Have you always wanted to learn an instrument?  Try taking lessons.  Getting out of your routine will help you feel like you are accomplishing something and not just showing up for life everyday whether you want to or not.

My guess is that thing you always wanted to do will be something you did as a child, but stopped doing because life stepped in.  Writing? Drawing? Creating? Telling stories?  Whatever gives you a sense of satisfaction start doing it, even if just a little and even if only once in a while.  A journey begins with one step.

5. Be yourself and be proud of it

What makes you uniquely you?  Do you laugh at the wrong time? Not understand jokes? Swear too much? Have a unique clothing style? Understand people more than most? Play a mean air guitar?  Whatever makes you who you are is what you need to focus on.

Being someone else is already taken so figure out what drives you as a human being and focus on strengthening that drive.

In the End

Did you know that many famous actors and musicians were homeless and/or extremely poor at one time?  I’m sure they felt lost and often disheartened, but did they give up? Nope.  They kept at it and so can you.

We all struggle. We all get stuck. We all have moments when we wonder where to go and what to do.  Don’t fight it.  Accept it.  Pick one thing and just do it. Do it once. Then, pick something else and try that.  Just because you are here today and stuck doesn’t mean you will be stuck forever.

One. Little. Step.